I Have Gone To A Room - Heart

I have gone to a room - heart has seized, as a sharp toothache: on a table the note grew white. Has rushed to it: "Or I the father with all following, or was not present. The child in two I will not begin to tear. In a family there should be one general law. The ugly creature otherwise will grow. It not for me. To children tell that me have caused in business trip. Farewell or good-bye - the life will show ". About that with me was! Sensation of full improbability happened, emptiness in a room, vacuum in a shower, loneliness as which I have felt at once - who is necessary to me after Egor? To be thrown on street, to catch up, return? But I know its hardness! And how now there will be children? And what I will tell to people? To parents?. Deafened, I lay on a bed. On ours with it of empty bed. Has risen, as beaten, grown old for hundred years. Shuffling slippers, has mechanically passed in a nursery, silently has laid Maxim. He too was silent, we have not said words. With a sigh I have stroked it on a head, he has convulsively sighed, has embraced my hand, has put under the cheek.